Game 70 Preview: Colorado Avalanche at Calgary Flames

It was a dark and stormy night.  I was walking along the beach, munching on some cupcakes I had been keeping in my hot pocket. They were tasty. Very tasty.  My mind wandered to how my Red Wings were doing, when, all of sudden, I heard a rumbling in the distance. At first, I thought it might be a Mack truck or maybe something pulling a heavy trailor. I was wrong. Very wrong. It was a tank. The tank rumbled towards me. Ponderously slow but steady in pace. Clearly, nothing was going to stop this tank. For a moment, I thought maybe the tank was going to run me over, but, at the last moment, it stopped. There was a long pause as I wondered what to do...should I run and risk getting torn down at the blueline or should I try to dump and chase? Wait, I told myself, this isn't hockey. This. Is. REALITY. Before I could act, a unicorn bound up the beach, trotted over to the tank, and lifted his leg to shower the tank with a stream of rainbow pee. I looked on, dumbfounded. The unicorn began to waltz away. But, before he did, he stopped, thought a moment and turned back to me and offered me some profound words of wisdom. "Hey, dumbass," the unicorn growled. "You spelled Saddledome wrong."

And, like that, he was gone...and there were just twelve of these left to write.