Avs play three turd periods, dismantled by Edmonton

Okay here's how this is gonna go down. Did you watch the game? You don't want to relive it. Did you miss it? You're really better off being spared the blow by blow. So here's a list of Takeaways and Things That Happened In This Suckass Game.

• Colorado tried a bold strategy tonight of "let's put a terrible even strength but very individually skilled team on the power play a lot." It worked about as well as you might expect. Edmonton was 3 for 7 on the power play.
  
• The Avs were 0 for 6 including a failed minute-plus of 5 on 3 time in the first period.
• Defending an Edmonton 3 on 2 in the first period, Jan Hejda lost his edge and slammed hard into the boards knee first. He didn't return and as I write this the only update is he's flying back to Denver, which sounds damn bad. Playing with 5 defensemen is hard enough, but when you lose one of your two (2) good defenders, a lock for his national team, you're gonna have a bad time. When Nate Guenin ends up leading your team in ice time, you're also gonna have a bad time.
• That said, probably because they were over their QoC and TOI heads, Tyson Barrie and Nate Guenin were SUCKASS BRUTAL tonight.
• Taylor Hall had a hat trick. The goals:
  
  • A total beerleague cherrypicking breakaway, in which the defensemen (Guenin/Barrie I think, correct me if I'm wrong/you care) let him get red line to blue line away from them.
  • An absolute laser beam of a one-timer with a 2-man advantage.
  • Some kind of goal with like twenty seconds left when no one was paying attention anymore.
A bra hit the ice with the hats. It's minus a billion degrees in Edmonton. A very cold lady right now did not think that one through.
• Semyon Varlamov was hung out to dry early and often, and as a result never got into the game. It wasn't until Goal 4 that it was reasonable to say he 100% should have made a save but he also didn't step up to make a big one to keep the team in it. Poor showing, with lots and lots of nudges in that direction from the team around him.
  
• MacKinnon played a very edgy game tonight, hit guys hard, skated harder, and even took a stupid high sticking penalty in the third hitting a guy back. Fire good. Uncontrolled burn bad.
• Bordeleau had to fight Gazdic after he charged a guy, the instigator from which negated a penalty, but boy did he get filled in. Not sure that's happened to him in the NHL before.
• The Avs had hope as late as the second period, when they killed a particularly bullshit penalty with authority, resulting in a solid offensive shift and a goal for P.A. Parenteau right after. It was 3-1 at that point. I noticed Roy ending PKs with O'Reilly and Duchene as the forward pair, which I really like because once the penalty expires that leaves them against a power play unit, which presumably is defensively suspect.
• I barely watched the third because it was absolutely miserable. Copy and paste this a few times: The Avs get the puck in their zone, turn it over, and look like an ECHL team as they get clowned on for a goal against. Then they take a penalty. (The order may be flipped here and there.) It was pretty clear that everyone had checked out and was just waiting for the clock to dwindle, which is unacceptable.
  
• I really doubt Roy leaves Varlamov in after Goal 4, but Giguere needs to be good to go for a date with Calgary tomorrow night.
• With the score 5-2 in the third and a power play, Roy brought Varly to the bench for a 6 on 4 advantage. What else if not? Nothing came of it but it's a good risk to take.
• The game ended, which was the best thing it could have done, all things considered.

Post of the Night: Americanario

Avs do a lot of charity work through out the year…..I just wish they’d stop doing it in Edmonton!

MHH Three Stars

1. Anyone who didn't watch the game

2. Cole D. Hamilton, who was originally slotted to write the recap but got to do some incredibly exciting literature thesis instead

3. Erik Johnson, who was the only Av to effectively shut anyone down tonight

Coming up!

The Avs get to put this one in the rear view mirror in a hurry. Hopefully they put the game tapes in a dumpster in detroit and never look back. Calgary, tomorrow night, 7:00 pm Mountain